SPECIAL FRIEND – OVERWEIGHT JESUS

You’re living proof that the human body can survive decades of beer, beige food and absolutely no preventative maintenance. Your knees are fucked, your eyesight’s going and your prostate is already browsing Rightmove for somewhere bigger. You’ve got more hair growing out of your ears than on your head, tits that need their own postcode and a stomach that enters the room before you do. After three pints you still think you’re twenty-five, right up until the next morning when getting out of bed resembles the resurrection of a particularly overweight Jesus. Love ya mate x