STEPDAUGHTER

Happy birthday to my stepdaughter, who didn’t inherit any of my genes but has somehow acquired several of my worst habits, which feels legally suspicious. I didn’t give you life, but I’ve provided lifts, food, advice and repeated explanations of things you could easily have searched for yourself. I’ve watched you make decisions I specifically warned against, then listened while you explained why the entirely predictable consequences weren’t technically your fault. You’ve taught me that family isn’t about sharing DNA. It’s about showing up, taking the piss and pretending not to notice who finished the last of the food. I may not have made you, but I’m incredibly proud of the woman you’ve become. Love you, Stepdaughter x