MOTHER-IN-LAW

Happy birthday to the woman whose child I married, proving that at least one of your parenting decisions worked out reasonably well. When we first met, you assessed my intentions, employment and general suitability with the warmth of an airport-security interview. Since then, you’ve generously supplied advice on relationships, money, cooking and several subjects nobody actually mentioned. I’ve learned that the correct response is to smile, agree enthusiastically and then quietly do whatever I intended in the first place. Thank you for welcoming me into the family and only occasionally reminding me that your child could apparently have done better. You’re a brilliant mother-in-law—and considerably less frightening than you initially appeared. Happy birthday. I’m behaving, honestly x